Expectation is the Thief of Joy

I was pondering today how much grief we give ourselves through our expectations. When we think something is going to happen a certain way and it doesn’t, it paves the way for disappointment and resentment.

We even feel totally justified in feeling this way, as if the rules of life were that things should always go the way we expect them to go.

How often is this at the very core of disputes within relationships? We expect that someone will meet our needs in a particular aspect of life. We expect that they will be loyal to us, love us from head to toes, agree with the things that are most important to us….and when they don’t, we feel let down, and we point the finger at them or the circumstance for not meeting our expectations.

That’s why free-falling is such a powerful practice. I’d even go so far as to say that it’s the most powerful practice we can ever undertake, even above meditation and yoga. Free falling is the act of letting go in every situation. This is what allows us to be “in flow”.

To free fall is to accept things exactly as they are unfolding.

It’s to have no expectations on the future. Sure, we can have overarching desires and intentions – for example, I have the intention to be on a spiritual path, opening to the lessons around me; I have the intention to help people and animals when the opportunity arises and I’m drawn to reach out; I have the intention to live a joy-filled life, and to create a truly happy home (physically and emotionally).
But beyond that, any other goal needs the proviso “Spirit willing”. Because when we set our goals, as powerful as we can be at reaching them, there are times that Spirit has other plans for us. Even the best laid plans can be swiped sideways, when there is a higher lesson at play.

So when we are expecting life to unfold in a particular way, we are seeing our human self as the ultimate creator of our reality. We forget that we are one particle in a much larger cosmos, and everything is unfolding as it needs to - not only for our learning, but for those around us.

When you find yourself confronted with a situation that hasn’t turned out the way you expected, what essential oils could you use to ease the sense of rigidity and control?

Roman and German chamomile are your answer.

They both work on the Solar Plexus chakra. This is the chakra responsible for our Will – that drive in life that gets us out of bed each day. It is also the chakra responsible for our yearning for recognition, our sense of self-worth and our urge to control.

Tension builds up in our Solar Plexus due to our perception that our needs aren’t being met (ie. our expectations aren’t matching reality). This leads to feelings of irritability and reactiveness, as we try even more to control our outer world to ensure our inner needs get met.
Roman and German Chamomile both help to ease this build-up of tension in the Solar Plexus, allowing the frustration and resentment to then naturally dissipate.

As that happens, we are able to free fall again, acknowledging that life happens for us not to us.
As we embrace this awareness, we can embrace life’s challenges with Mindfulness and Presence, and with a knowing that this challenge is appearing as an opportunity for our own growth.

We can either throw a tantrum at the Universe, or accept the challenge and allow ourselves to grow through it.

If you are looking for a blend that contains both Roman and German Chamomile, then look no further than Young Living’s Surrender oil blend. In addition to the Chamomile twins, it also combines Lavender, Lemon, Black Spruce, Angelica and Mountain Savory. And its aroma? It’s utterly heavenly. This blend was created to help us at those times when our need to control has gotten out of control, and we simply need to let go and let God. Pop a drop on each shoulder, and watch yourself let go.

Just a word of caution – because this blend contains Lemon oil, it needs to be applied to skin that will be protected by clothing if that patch of skin is going to be in direct sunlight or UV light within the next 12-24 hours.

Did you know?

Chamomile was used in Ancient Egypt to worship the Sun God, Ra? It became an important remedy in ancient Egyptian medicine, recognised for its ability to restore wholeness to the Self.

And no wonder! Have you ever noticed that the greatest things that happen to us in life are the unexpected? They are the things that weren’t planned for, that weren’t strategized for. Instead, they came from beyond our peripheral vision, opening an unseen doorway right in front of us, leading us in a whole new direction.

When we stop trying to control our life, we can surrender to our true destiny. It is always far greater than we could ever have imagined.

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